Luke Konkel
Position: Program Site Coordinator
Spotted: At Stockade, instilling work ethic in his boys (Jace & Levi), not in the office, or disc golfing
Experience: 9 years on Missionary Staff
In His Own Words: Can you share a moment or decision that significantly shaped your life? What did you learn from it?
Luke Konkel and I (Jordan) had the opportunity to sit down and meet one morning after breakfast and I got the chance to pick his brain for a little bit about this question. He had a lot of great wisdom to share from his life.
He shared with me that a significant moment that shaped his life was when his dad died. Luke shared about his dad, about how he was hard working and tough, but also loving. “Everyone loved him,” he said as he shared. Luke described how, at 14 years old, his relationship with his dad was difficult at times for the normal teenage reasons. “Most kids don’t think their parents are cool or they hate them because they’re getting limited or not allowing them to do certain things.”
“My biggest thing [that I learned] is you don’t know what you have until it’s gone.” He shared about the dangers of living in the past and always saying, “I wish I would have…” but there is wisdom to looking back and reflecting on what you would do differently. Luke talked about how he wished someone would have said to him. “Maybe your parents are looking out for your best interest. Maybe they are not as cool or not letting you do certain things or date certain people because they love you. They care about you and want the best for you.” He went on to reflect on his own parenting and how much it reflects his dad, “Everything I hated about my dad back then, I’m doing because I see the value now.”
JORDAN: From that season, what is something that you would say you learned out of that or advice you’d give to someone going through a season like that?
This pivotal time pushed him into a season of searching. “When he died, I just started searching. I wanted good men in my life, my mom wanted good men in my life, and that was difficult to find.” As a 14-year-old, he didn’t have to go searching far. “I had a coach for wrestling and football, he was very good at capitalizing on my dad’s work ethic and working hard. He was a good coach but not a great man, so then I started going to church more.” Luke then began to describe the church he grew up in. It was a great church but because of its size, it didn’t have a youth group. “But we had a sister church that was growing their youth group and so I went there all the time. The youth pastor was huge and influential and I purposefully, even if I didn’t want to, I would go. That opened up doors for other men to invest in me.”
As we continued to talk, Luke shared three main things that he learned in this season of his life, and which still shape the way he lives today:
Find someone to mentor you or pour into your life.
Luke shared about the impact his coach had on his life and work ethic, the way his youth pastor influenced his life spiritually, and how years later when joining staff at Fort Wilderness, there were multiple older men on staff that actively poured into his life. He emphasized the importance of finding someone older to walk alongside you in life and share their wisdom.
When you are looking for a mentor, here is some wisdom that Luke shared:
- Look around and make sure you are first listening to the people that are around you like parents, coaches, older siblings, teachers, etc. “If you are not willing to listen to the people that are there, I would address that heart issue first.”
- “Mentors are not always going to come find you.” Luke talked about not sitting by and just waiting for someone to come to you. If you are looking for a mentor, go out and take the initiative in looking for a mentor.
- “Looking for people you want to emulate.” He shared that you should be looking for people that you believe set an example in the area you are wanting to grow in. For example, Luke shared about how him and his wife Erin did this. “We really like a couple different parents’ parenting styles. So, we asked them to be active in our parental journey.”
- “It’s on [you] to actually ask.” Luke went on talk about how its important to take responsibility for your learning and growth. If you see someone that you would like to learn from, be willing to ask. As an example, you can ask, “I really like how you did things, can you share this with me that over the summer?”
Find someone for you to give back and pour into.
As we were talking about mentors and how they can be influential in shaping the lives of young people, Luke shared that there was a flip side to the mentorship coin that was important to not miss. “You do need to give back at some point. I could start investing in others because whatever I’ve learned from Paul [and others], I can now pass onto younger staff.” As Luke shared about his family and kids, he talked about how a switched flipped, “I might not have all the answers, but I could be helpful.”
Surround yourself with friends/community that will be uplifting.
Luke shared that this life lesson was one that he began to learn when he was in sports but has carried into the rest of his life. Luke shared that it was important to have “a core group of guys, good guys, who are looking out for your best interest, who are not showing you things they shouldn’t, that are not encouraging you to [make] bad life choices.”
In conclusion, Luke shared a lot of his life and how the relationships you surround yourself with are so important. Whether you are going through a tough & challenging season or one of deep joy & peace, surround yourself with people that will care for you, encourage you, and ultimately lead you more towards Christ.